In the fields of Tuomarinkylä, 0ºC/+32ºF, 45 minutes

11.2.2014 In the morning

The ground is wet. During the session I’m thinking couple of times: is my zabuton (the big square-shaped pillow under me) going to be wet. I have a cover for it but it’s not waterproof. Because of these thoughts I start to observe different kinds of voices speaking in my mind. This first fellow is a little bit worried. He is concerned what happens if the zabuton gets too wet. The ground under the thin blanket of snow is quite muddy, so, this part of myself is thinking, is the pillow going to be unusable because of this mud and water.

The second point of view or inner voice is an annoyed one. He thinks that the thoughts of the worried part is just materialistic and shallow. What happens, happens. That’s all.

Then there is some kind of "rational" voice, who is saying that if the pillow becomes muddy, it can be cleaned or if it’s too dirty I can get a new one for indoor use. The voice says: "It’s no big deal".

At some point I notice that I’m reporting my experiences. It is like a meditation diary written inside my head. This narrator is explaining to me what is happening. Somehow I start to wonder, is this voice a little bit funny and ironic. Somehow its tone is connected to a thought about comedy or farce.

In the end part of the session I notice that I’m also translating my experience into English. Then there is simultaneously some kind of observer who is thinking what is the influence of this writing project for my meditation experience. The situation/dialogue/choir of voices is so confusing that I start to laugh.